enoughFeeling Like I’m Not Enough

Praise is the antidote to not enough. http://wp.me/p7W1vk-cG via @blestbutstrestI wander along the road in the desert, feeling off-kilter and slightly out-of-sorts. Maybe my feelings of discontent come from wondering if I have enough. Will I have enough time to fit everything into the day, enough money to pay my taxes, and enough patience with my spring-fever-filled students?

I long for assurance that I will make it through this quarter, that I will have enough to meet my needs, that the hummingbirds will actually return, that my dreams will one day come to fruition. As I walk along, no birdsong relieves the silence. After scanning the saguaros with my binoculars, I clamp them under my arm.

When the birds seem far away and uncooperative, I have learned that something else always catches my attention. Not five minutes later it happens. The cactus blossoms blend in to the surrounds so much that I almost miss them. Their pale green petals protrude discreetly from the end of the thorny branches.

As the light dims even more and the sun threatens to set before I reach my destination, I snap a few photos. Suddenly, as if the almost-missed flowers acted as a key unlocking my vision, I see hundreds of tiny flowers.

Tomorrow I will return in the early morning and discover all I can—only next time I’ll bring my macro lens.

And I do. This time, the golden rays of sunlight illuminate tiny, thumb-sized daisies, and the little flecks of yellow cloaked within the purple milkwort. Peace fills me as I drop to the ground and see how closely I can focus without a tripod. The faint perfume of an unseen flower wafts by on the gentle breeze.enough

The Hidden Secrets of Creation are Enough

Who cares that no rare bird will flit into my vision today? I have desert flowers in the springtime and a lens that reveals the care of my creator in every single element of nature. My inner bubble of delight forces the what ifs to slough off me like a snake shedding its skin.enough

The feeling of delight lingers with me throughout the rest of the day as we visit a butterfly pavilion and botanical gardens. The hairy detail of a butterfly’s wing jumps into focus under my lens. I discover hidden fields of flowers at the center of each blossom.

Feelings of inadequacy, ineptitude, and irritation have no room in a life of praising God. He is enough—I don’t have to even try. I only need to praise him.Feelings of inadequacy, ineptitude, and irritation have no room in a life of praising God. #BGBG2 Click To Tweet

enoughQ4U: What do you do when you’re feeling inadequate and as if you’re not enough?

Make sure you drop by #InspireMeMonday’s other hostess over at Blessed (but Stressed)!

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14 Comments

  1. Love the photo of the butterfly on the flower. If only we took more time to just be and praise and take in God’s creation. I’m going to try and savor and take in the Holy moments during Holy Week. I’m over in the 39 spot at FMF this week.

  2. Oh my goodness!!!! I don’t think I’ve visited you Anita! I’m sorry i never knew you have your new space here. It’s lovely…
    And of course praise even ​when you don’t want to makes a huge difference.
    Blessings to you and Happy Easter in advance
    Ifeoma Samuel recently posted…When Mercy SpeaksMy Profile

  3. Thank you for your candor and extraordinary photographs. Who hasn’t stumbled over feelings of inadequacy? On the other side we can appreciate them as gifts from God. Our inadequacy can open our eyes to a new level of blessing and dependence on our Savior. Thanks for starting off our week in wonder and thanksgiving.

  4. i love your solution to feelings of inadequacy! praise and worship of GOD! i have never lived in the west. i love the beautiful flowers and colors:) there is so much we take for granted for sure!

  5. I find the same sense of peace when I am outside looking through my iPhone camera lens. It is always a treat to find the unique and capture it. You are right that there is no room for grumblings when praise is shining from every corner. Easter blessings to you and yours!
    Mary Geisen recently posted…What Can You Do In One Week?My Profile

  6. The great outdoors and God’s creation is always a balm to my soul. Not sure I ever feel “not enough” – I think I lean towards “I’m too much” as in “just too much” – hope you know what I mean when I say that. I would love to see in your soul and know what that “dream” is of yours? Will you share? xo
    Susan Shipe recently posted…GethsemaneMy Profile

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Anita Ojeda

Anita Ojeda juggles writing with teaching high school English and history. When she's not lurking in odd places looking for rare birds, you can find her camping with her kids, adventuring with her husband or mountain biking with her students.

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