The Importance of Being Kind and Gentle in a Rough and Tumble World

It’s taken me decades to understand that being kind and gentle gets better results than lashing out in frustration and anger.#kind #gentle #kindwords #anger #indignation #harshwords #bully #Jesus

It’s taken me decades to understand that being kind and gentle gets better results than lashing out in frustration and anger.

This post is part of the Five-Minute Friday quick write hosted by Kate Moutang. Join us each Thursday night on Twitter (#FMFParty) for fun and fellowship, then grab a pen and start writing when the prompt goes live!

It’s taken me decades to understand that being kind and gentle gets better results than lashing out in frustration and anger.#kind #gentle #kindwords #anger #indignation #harshwords #bully #Jesus

Anything But Kind and Gentle

“What are you doing?” I yelled at the little boy as I ran towards him. “Where are your parents? Hasn’t anyone ever taught you not to throw sand?”

He shrugged in reply and stuck his tongue out at me.

My anger flamed higher. For the last six minutes, I’d watched him shove other kids and throw sand at them at the playground. It bothered me to watch the little bully, but when he tossed sand at MY kids, I had to intervene. Especially when I saw my daughters’ faces crumple in confusion at the unmerited attack.

I couldn’t let this little bully ruin my beautiful spring day at the park. So I squatted down at his level and glowered at him. “Do not. Throw. Sand,” I shouted.

He shrugged and walked to a different part of the playground. My sense of righteous indignation wanted to justify my loud voice and harsh words. But a creeping sense of shame clamored in my soul.

I had forgotten my resolutions to use kind and gentle words with others. In yelling and screaming at a defenseless child, I had also set a horrible example for my girls. I realized I had a problem.

What Does Jesus Want?

Jesus wants us to use kind and gentle words and let him take care of the accusations and judgement.

For so many years I had let my sense of outrage take over my good sense whenever I saw a bully in action. But on that spring day, on the eve of Easter, a picture of Jesus flashed before my eyes.

People bullied him. They spit on him, cursed him, called him vile names, and accused him of crimes he didn’t commit. When he spoke, his kind and gentle words held firmness, but not hate or recrimination.

Even when his best friends betrayed him he didn’t yell or scream or shout.

Kind and gentle words don’t come naturally to me in heated situations, but by God’s grace, I’m learning to pray first and speak second. I still mess up at times, but adding the habit of prayer before blurting out my first thoughts has improved my communication skills. And kept me from screaming at small children.

The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.

James 3:6 NIV
When your tongue threatens to burst into flames, remember Jesus. #fmfparty Click To Tweet
It’s taken me decades to understand that being kind and gentle gets better results than lashing out in frustration and anger.#kind #gentle #kindwords #anger #indignation #harshwords #bully #Jesus

15 Comments

  1. I so feel you on this! My natural inclination is to speak in abrupt sentences, almost orders, and it’s been a years-long journey to let God soften me. I still snap occasionally, but I can feel the difference in my heart now, and the rewards, especially in my own family, have been so lovely. It’s hard, though! 😅
    Ellie Di Julio recently posted…Come let us adore him: an Easter carolMy Profile

  2. I used to think fighting was fine
    (it’s How The West Was Won),
    but now I think it may be time
    to holster up my gun,
    climb on down from horse’s height,
    tie reins unto a tree,
    and learn about another Might
    that went and died for me
    with Hands outstretched to take the binds
    that were not really needed,
    for He was truly of a mind
    that could not be defeated
    when gentleness stood strong and straight
    to save us from our self-made fate.
    Andrew Budek-Schmeisser recently posted…Of Two WorldsMy Profile

  3. I’ve been working with an individual the past few weeks who is NOT kind and gentle. It’s really tiring. I can’t wait for the task to end so I can get away from the person. It makes me appreciate all the more those who are kind and gentle, and encourages me to continue to aim for that as well. Thanks for this message today, Anita.
    Lisa notes recently posted…When Hope Refuses to Stay Down —Grace & Truth LinkupMy Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Anita Ojeda

Anita Ojeda juggles writing with teaching high school English and history. When she's not lurking in odd places looking for rare birds, you can find her camping with her kids, adventuring with her husband or mountain biking with her students.

You may also like

Follow Me!
%d bloggers like this: